Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Many Thanks

Our family feels it is appropriate at this time to thank everyone for the many thoughts prayers, acts of kindness and tears shed for our sweet daughter. I suppose at this point we can say that her cancer is not present in her body. She does have some abnormalities at her cancer site and 4 enlarged lymph nodes, but for now they are thinking it is scare tissue. We feel so blessed. Our path continues with consistent blood draws, scans and check ups to make sure that her cancer stays at bay. As I have reflected over the last 9 months my heart is full of emotion. I can honestly say that this has been the most difficult thing I have ever had to go through. I know that in this life we all have our challenges, and even as difficult as this has been I wouldn't trade my trials for anyone else! I truly believe that we are faced with specific trials for specific reasons. In the beginning, before the diagnosis was given to us I was praying and praying that there would be nothing wrong with her. I really thought that I couldn't handle anything major coming into our lives at the time. Now I don't believe that my prayers were completely for not, but I do believe that my Heavenly Father had a bigger plan for my husband and me, our daughter and our family. After this experience I know that I have learned things that I couldn't have learned without an experience similar to this. I am so much stronger than I ever knew. I am more knowledgeable in terms of medical procedures, language and can say that I quickly became a professional at broviac line care and giving shots. My resolve to help others in their times of need has been strengthen. My testimony in my Savior Jesus Christ and in my Heavenly Father has grown tremendously. Even in the darkest hardest times I was lifted up and given strength and comfort that were not from any earthly power, but were from a higher power. My family has been brought closer, I have a renewed compassion for my children and the difficulties associated with growing up, learning and changing. My relationship with my husband has been taken to a new level. I love him so much and through this process have seen a side to him and to me that we never new existed. We have learned better communication with one another, we have learned how to listen to one another and to buoy each other up when we are sinking from the weight of our trials. We learned to turn to our Savior to carry us when we have done all that we can. We have been touched by the love and support of others, even people we barely know and those we don't know at all. We have had a shift in our perspective. Instead of focusing on the daily monotony of tasks to be done, our focus is on an eternal perspective. There are so many things that seem so important now and when we look at the whole picture we realize that what is important is not the things that come and go in this life, but the things that remain with us forever. I have learned to "dance in the rain". When life comes at you you're given a choice, that choice is to moan and complain or to look for the good that is somewhere within all things (even as little as it may be at times). I know that when we are able to focus on the blessings we have, the love that we share, the small steps in progression we can be lifted up even in the toughest of times. I know our unfamiliar path has not come to an end, but it has taken a small turn and as we continue down this path with many unknowns in the future I know one thing for sure....We are not in this alone. Our daughter, our children and my husband and I will always have the comfort of the Spirit with us and the strength and love of our Savior Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father!

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Unchanged.....Good News

We were up at the Oncology Clinic on Tuesday. I have been nervous for this appointment for a while now. As I started my day I planned everything out to the minute. I got my babysitter early so I could run my errands and make it up to the clinic just in time. Like always I got off a little late, had to fill the car up with gas and make an unexpected stop. I was amazed with myself when I got to my last stop with plenty of time to spare.........the only thing is that I was 30 minutes off of the time I really needed it to be. I quickly left for the hospital and realized that I had no idea how to get to the hospital from where I was. I called my Sister In-Law for directions only to have to get the same directions from her three times. As I was driving I had a dizzy spell and barely made it down the road (the dizziness only lasted about 30 seconds). I was really out of it all day. I think that I was having some serious anxiety about what we would find out from her scans. Well after my crazy morning I am happy to report that we did make it to our appointment. Dr. Wright, our daughters oncologist met with us and informed us that her scans were unchanged from her scans 6 weeks ago. She said that the thickening of her uterus is probably from scar tissue. Her AFP (tumor marker) is back down to 2.3. So the next step from here is to continue post chemo checks. She will have her next MRI, Chest X-ray, blood work and Audiogram 3 months from now and she will only have one blood draw 6 weeks from now in between scans. This is great news. We are sooooooooo relieved. Thank you again to everyone for your support, love and prayers.